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To Lose You Episode 19

Read episode 19 here:

“I honestly do not give a fuck.”

This time, it was Lucas and I whose heads turned slowly toward Calum.

Again, he was the most responsible one of the three. Lucas had often accused his brother of having a stick up his ass.

Yet here we were.

“I have to admit: I agree. With the way my head is right now, I can’t get through that bullshit. And I think I’ll kill Monica if I see her in person any time soon.”

“Well, what the fuck are we supposed to do, then? Our companies need a face present—” Luke went quiet at the look we were giving him. “Oh, no. No. No.”

“You’re the only back-up plan. Our companies teamed up on this.”

His nostrils flared with an exasperated breath. “Fucking, fine. Fine. Just don’t get thrown into jail for stalking while I’m gone.” He reached into his pocket and flicked a card key at his brother. “Wait in my room. Both of you. I mean it. You’re acting like strung out junkies. You don’t need to be in your rooms and be reminded of those girls.”

For someone with no experience when it came to love, the fucker was really astute.

And that’s how Calum and I ended up locked in Lucas’ room for the next few hours. We ransacked the mini-bar in the suite; which, thanks to Luke’s proclivities, was well stocked with hard liquor.

We drank.

We paced.

We kept trying those damned phones although they kept going to voicemail.

Eventually, Calum collapsed on the couch in the sitting area.

I was a miserable wreck on the coffee table.

He nursed his drink and tugged at his bow-tie with his free hand. Hazel gaze flickering to me, he finished off that drink and leaned back against the cushions. “It’s a video. It’s awful, but it’s part of your past. I’m sure you’ll find a way to get her back. Especially if she’s smarter than I am.”

“I don’t know, man. Those kinds of images aren’t easy for some people to get over.” I yanked at my hair, eyes fixated on the screen of my phone. As if I could mentally will her to reach out.

To love me enough to bridge this gap.

“At least you didn’t cheat.”

That comment brought my head back up. “Does Livana know you didn’t actually kiss Diane back?”

Calum flung his bow-tie across the room in his frustration. “I don’t think so, and it doesn’t matter. I cheated. I cheated the moment I let Diane fucking kiss me and I didn’t pull away.”

“Why?” I asked. Even with my own issues eating me alive—this angsty, restless desperation that was vibrating through every cell in my body as I envisioned a future without Demi in it—I couldn’t stop myself from wondering what the fuck possessed him to do it. “I thought you didn’t have any lingering feelings for her.”

“I don’t. I really don’t. But . . . Livana can be difficult. Distant. I’ve been falling like a fool for her since I met her, and I knew she felt the same. But she tried so hard to hide it sometimes. To keep distance. I didn’t know why until we got here.” He paused, as if he sensed that his next words might bother me. “She was still messed up from an ex of hers years ago. I found out about him here. He’s after her, still wants her. I lost my shit about it. Like a fucking scumbag, I just . . .” His shoulders jerked in a bitter shrug.

I ran a hand down the side of my face. “I’m so screwed.” This had nothing to do with age, maturity. It all boiled down to raw emotions. If Calum, a man in his mid-thirties, could fall so insanely in love that merely meeting Liv’s ex sent him spiraling like that, what would those images do to Demi? “Monica stroke first,” I growled, consumed by pure hellfire and bloodlust. “I’m going to legally decimate everything she is. Her father. Her family. I don’t give a fuck. I’m going to ruin her.”

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